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One should not eat
this way hitting thirty. A bowl full of fetid cholesterol and saturated
fat is like swallowing a live grenade for a man my age. But it's so
good, what's a little shrapnel to the bowels between octogenarians?
Honestly, they should call this place Yums! If teriyaki and barbeque
chicken could supplant God as, well, god, there would actually be
a lot of grateful folks out there just waiting to grovel or shimmy
(or whatever one does in front of their deity) at the bowl of greatfulness
(sic). It is rare for me to actually daydream about poultry (unless
it's that Burger King chicken guy who just freaks the hell out of
me), so this must be some seriously special squawkmeat. The place
has all the earmarks of an awful Chinese fast-food chain, including
the assembly line set up, the multiple steam tables and guys with
giant spoons and paper hats just waiting to scoop you a glob of congealed
MSG and cartilage. But looks can be deceiving. The meat is actually
of a decent quality, the food fresh and hot, and I have yet to bite
down on a knuckle, knee cap or rotator cuff. Now my assessment was
that the place was a total greasepit, but a Chinese co-worker happened
to mention that she thought it was one of the least offensive in that
category she has tried in a long time. This place is Chinese kinda
in the way Taco Bell is Mexican. They take some Chinese foods and
add their own twist to it. Last time I checked there was no barbeque
or teriyaki chicken in Chinese cuisine, the same way I'm pretty damn
sure that Mexico has never seen the likes of a chalupa or gordita.
The good thing is that I could give two shits about authenticity when
they make chicken that tastes like candy that tastes like sweet, sweet
nirvana. [MF]
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